Club Etiquette (for Women)

Throughout my years I’ve often read articles about women bashing men, their actions and how they come to the club. Most of it is true and some of us do need to step our game up. But what about all of you?

Hair
-Please get your hair did before leaving the house. I know it’s an ongoing joke that men don’t pay attention to a woman’s hair, and it’s true. Reason being, well quite frankly we don’t want to commit x rated acts to your hair. Have you ever heard a guy say “baby, I want to rub, lick, and suck your hair (if your answer is yes, than I’m scared for you)? No you haven’t, it’s not really our center of concern. Your hair style looked great last Saturday, and this Saturday you changed the style to something else great. As long as it looks good, we’re happy. We may not notice the change, but we do notice that your hair looks great. Unfortunately I think some of you feel that you can take advantage of this fun fact. So you asked yourself, “shoot why bother doing my hair if they ain’t gonna notice?” Well guess what, although we do not notice or comment on all your fabulous hair styles, we certainly do notice if your hair is all jacked up. I can’t believe you left the house like that. You know your mother wouldn’t have allowed you to leave like that when you were a child. What makes you think you should do it as an adult? At least comb it…geez.

B.O.
– Yes body odor. I’ve been to many clubs and been exposed to what I think it worse than tear gas. From my experience (because I must seek out the source) I know it’s not always the guys. At times a guy can get away with not freshening up after working 12 hours and heading out. Why? Because we wear layers. We have on an undershirt, over that a button up and over that maybe a sports coat. We can mask and cover up our funk, sometimes. You on the other hand, are wearing a sleeveless top. I have a secret to tell you, your Secret brand deodorant or what have you, does not really last 24 hrs. I’m sorry, we can smell you. It’s a turn off to guys and I’m sure the ladies around you don’t appreciate it either. Also, men wear underwear; over that we were jeans, again we keep in the funk. You? Well you are wearing a skirt…..  do the math.

Rudeness
-I’ve been a victim of this in the past and it’s unnecessary. Unless a man is completely inappropriate in the way he approaches you, there is no need for you to respond with harsh words or throw an elbow. It’s rude, ugly and immature. However, there’s a bigger reason why you shouldn’t do it. Some men are confident and approach women they know are clearly out of their league.  Some men won’t approach a woman either because women flock to them or because they are shy. On the other hand, the rest of the male population has standards. Meaning they approach someone who as far as the looks go, are on the same level. In other words, if a man approached you properly and you think he is repulsive or just ok, guess what. Chances are he feels the same way about you and thought the two of you could be ugly together. So just simply say you aren’t interested, because at the end of the day, you might not be as hot as you think are.

So you think you can dance
– No, no you can’t, sorry.  Some of you go to the club and just want to dance with your girls. I get it now (I think), but I never understood the concept when I was younger. Regardless, I accepted it and moved on. Some of you choose to dance with us, which is wonderful. However, when you leave your girls behind and choose to dance with someone, you must realize that you are no longer dancing by yourself. It’s just silly and awkward if we aren’t moving to the same beat. Two options:   either let me lead or you lead and I will follow along.  Now if you do choose to lead, if you are dancing to the song that’s playing in your head and not the song the dj is playing…. I’m going to gently tap you and say thanks. Then I’m going to ask your friend to dance, ‘cause while suffering with you I realized I made a poor choice and she is the better dancer.

Diva
– This doesn’t really have to do with the club, but I thought I’d throw it here. Some women like to refer to themselves as divas. I thought I knew the meaning of this word, but the way it was being tossed around I was forced to pull out my Merriam-Webster dictionary.

Diva – 1: PRIMA DONNA      2: glamorous and successful  female performer or personality.

Dude, you aren’t a performer and nobody knows you……. Please act accordingly.

I did look up Prima Donna as well:
Prima Donna – 1: a principal female singer (as in an opera company).       2: a vain undisciplined usually uncooperative person.

We already established you aren’t a singer so that just leaves you with undisciplined and uncooperative.

-Vic Louis

p.s.        You are all beautiful in your own way.

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7 Comments

Filed under Women

7 responses to “Club Etiquette (for Women)

  1. sweetnbeautiful

    I have to say your post about female attitudes in the club is true. No excuses, but we’ve experienced some hard headed dudes who don’t understand a polite no, let alone a ruff one.

  2. ESA

    um body odor seaps through layers.. so fellas please dont think that since you are wearinig layers that your stench won’t slip through, cuz it does!

    and I would have to agree with sweetnbeautiful.. more often than not, a previous dude couldn’t understand a nice no, which then had to be turned into an elbow no and eye roll, which ultimately ended up ruining it for the next nice guy.

  3. Inquiring M.

    “if a man approached you properly and you think he is repulsive or just ok, guess what. Chances are he feels the same way about you and thought the two of you could be ugly together. So just simply say you aren’t interested, because at the end of the day, you might not be as hot as you think are.”

    This just made me really sad… I SO hope this isn’t true- ugh!

  4. e

    “if a man approached you properly and you think he is repulsive or just ok, guess what. Chances are he feels the same way about you and thought the two of you could be ugly together.”

    I said something along those lines to a female once………..I thought she was gonna smack me. So much for being honest. *shrugs*

  5. HUMPH! I’m a Diva! LOL but thanks for the PSA

    ~S~

  6. Perfectly Imperfect

    “On the other hand, the rest of the male population has standards. Meaning they approach someone who as far as the looks go, are on the same level”

    This is very true, this or they feel that you are somewhat below them yet still in a good enough standing position so that in the event that they are rejected they don’t get their ego hurt as bad. However there is nothing worse than a dude getting his ego hurt because he went up to a girl, girl says no and dude throws a hissy fit “Well I didn’t want to dance with your ugly ass anyway”…Really dude? so had a said yes to you the cameras would have appeared from behind the DJ booth and Ashton would have announced you’ve been PUNK’D??

    Hair- Good to know men notice the bad hair days.

    B.O. well its B.O whether you cover it, layer it or try to hide it. Freshen up people with today’s advance technology there is many little tricks you can use…..the best one ever…BABY WIPES. No excuses.

  7. “So just simply say you aren’t interested”

    ***rolling on the floor laughing hysterically and crying maniacal tears because you have no idea that this NEVER EVER works and usually ends up very VERY badly, being called 5 types of bitches and being assumed a lesbian is the least of the backlash of this simple statement***

    Men haven’t the slightest

    I’ll send you the link to a blog post I did on this very statement. smh.

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