It’s been a long time coming for me to discuss my frequent visits. Unfortunately I don’t mean Puerto Rico, though I’d love to visit there. Well if it counts I’ve been to their airport several times, just never made it to the exit doors. Anyways by P.R. I mean public restrooms. 9 out of 10 times it’s guaranteed to be a frustrating and or strange experience. Below is a quick list of things I seem to have to deal with weekly. Don’t run away, I’ll spare you the appetite-losing details.
Cell phone use
If you want to send a text that’s your own business and can be done in silence. I can handle to sound of keypad tapping. Having phone conversations are another thing. Why answer the phone if you’re in a stall? Why answer the phone if you’re in a stall in a public restroom? My favorite is the guy who while clearly sitting on the toilet answered his cell phone and said “I’ll be right there, I’m just finishing something up.” Come on, really?
There’s one guy who likes to print sport articles to keep himself entertained I suppose. I wouldn’t do it, but hey whatever works. The thing that gets me is that he leaves the articles behind every time. Why? Is he leaving it behind for the next patron? How considerate of him, what a great guy. Thanks, but no thanks. I’m definitely not picking that up to read it. “I don’t know where your hands have been” just doesn’t say enough in this situation.
I understand we have motion detector flushing systems, but is it really that hard to make sure it all went down? I like surprises as much as the next guy, but I’ll pass on the poolside surprise. Again thanks, but no thanks I’m easily traumatized.
Restrooms open to the all ages at locations such as the mall are one thing. I’m talking about the restrooms at my workplace. Unless you’re an intern you have to be at least 22 since there’s a lot of hiring right out of college. No little boys here, only adults. That being said, it is beyond my comprehension why I find urine on the toilet seats. I don’t mean one or two little drops. Sometimes it looks someone was trying to write an upside down “U.”
Personally I wouldn’t take a cup that I’m drinking out of, walk into my own private bathroom, then leave and continue drinking out of it. Therefore it sickens me when I see people bring their cups into a p.r. and continue to drink out of it. Know what kind of particles fell into your cup or soiled your straw?
There’s more of course, but I promised I wouldn’t make you lose your lunch. Before I go I do have a question for you ladies since I’ve never experienced this myself. Why in the world is there a couch in the women’s restroom? Do you just sit down and read a magazine or talk about men while other women are sitting or squatting over toilet seats? <insert disturbed facial expression here>
– Vic Louis
p.s. I watched a group of construction workers cross a highway. Crossed with no type of preventative measure that would protect them from getting run over. Not the brightest idea, but whatever the chicken had to cross the road for some reason and so did they. One of the workers dropped his hat (not his hard hat) and didn’t realize it until after he made it safely to the other side. What really boggled my mind was that he ran back to the middle lane of a notoriously busy highway just to pick it up and ran back. Some may call him fearless, however, I call him foolish. That damn hat better have been worth millions.
Have fun and safe weekend.