Everyone wants to go skydiving lately. I’ve been asked by several people over the past year and they seem shocked that I say no. Why?
I’m not in the military. I’m not a paratrooper. I’m not going behind enemy lines and the only way in is to jump out of a plane. All of a sudden everyone in my age group wants to do this. Are you all having a pre-midlife crisis? Are you doing it for a rush? For excitement? My life has enough excitement. Every morning when I walk outside my house I wonder if I will find my car sitting on 2 (not even 4) cinder blocks with no wheels – again. When I hear sirens I wonder if I will get pulled over. Then I wonder if I will get shot because supposedly my cell phone resembled an assault rifle. That’s all the rush I need to jump-start my day. In addition, why would I pay money to jump out of a perfectly good plane?
A couple of days ago a friend of mine told me I should go sky diving, then blog about the experience. No sir, I will not. However, I will blog about why I refuse to do it.
Have you ever waited in line and the person behind you is just a little too close? So close you can feel & hear them breathing? So close they make contact with you? No? Well it happens to me and annoys the sh*t out of me. With that in mind, so now you expect me to get on a plane and have some random smiley guy with sunglasses strap himself behind me? Hell no.
Maybe about 2 years ago I stopped by an old co-worker’s house. She told me she went sky diving and asked if I wanted to watch the video. I said sure. While she was popping the dvd in the player, she went on about how exhilarating it was and everyone should try it. She hit play and I watched. You know what it looked like? It looked like someone with chapped lips falling from the sky with a smiley guy wearing sunglasses strapped to her back. Whoopty Doo!
Lastly, the most obvious. Because I don’t want my mother’s only son to die before his time! Not that way at least. Yea sure, there’s a one in a million chance of me dying in a sky diving accident, that’s nice. However, there’s a one in a million chance of someone winning the lottery, yet someone wins right?
– Vic Louis