Ladies, if you just woke up beside a new guy for the first time, an interesting event, or test rather, may have taken place while you were sleeping. It’s called the good morning test (so I just learned). It is when a guy wakes up in the morning and takes a real good look at you for the first time. Without the makeup that is. You might still be sleeping or even be awake maybe. You may already be aware of this event, or maybe not. Before I dive into this post about the necessity of the “good morning” test, here’s the brief conversation between a friend and I that led to it.
Friend: Oh. Post request. Please. On the Good Morning test.
Me: The good morning test? [I wondered if that meant bad breath, and without thinking I immediately and discretely performed the breath test. I just did it again while writing this. Weird.]
Friend: When you look at a girl the following morning to see how she looks outside of makeup and out of the club, is that important to most men?
Me: Oooooooooooh, that. Hell yea it is!
Makeup is an evil thing. Makeup is a lie. It can transform the most hideous person into a thing of beauty. Not too long ago I was looking through an album posted by Pebbles, a popular radio personality in New England. The album had pictures of female celebrities without their makeup on. They weren’t just any celebrities. They were the women that most men are crazy about. For me, the experience was traumatizing. I couldn’t believe what some of them looked like without wearing their masks. I almost took an oath never to watch tv again.
As far as the test goes, I have given it before. Fortunately I have usually been happy with the results. Unfortunately just like in school, at least one person fails the test. In short, I met a girl. We talked, went on dates and what have you. Eventually one night we did the funky monkey. She decided to spend the night and it was fine by me. I went to sleep feeling a sense of accomplishment. Woke up the next morning and BAM! WTF! Overnight the lies must have fallen off her face because the same person that fell asleep beside me was gone. Complete transformation.
Men don’t wear makeup. Well, most men don’t wear makeup. Besides some eye crust, dried up drool and a 5 o’clock shadow, I would imagine they look the same in the morning hours. I don’t wake up with a man’s face before me, so I would need a woman’s knowledge on that. Women on the other hand, I can speak on that. Some just don’t need makeup. They are absolutely beautiful without it. Some women, they are attractive and makeup just enhances their beauty. The rest of them… Well if you aren’t a fan of surprises….. be careful.
Like I always say, I can’t speak for every man on Earth. The test is important to me. Is it important to every man? I don’t know. To simply things, I will say this. If you don’t care if a girl looks like the picture below after the makeup comes off, then no, the “good morning” test is not important.
– Vic Louis
p.s. Somehow adding this picture messed up the html behind this post. It keeps merging the paragraphs together. I had to dig deep into my forgotten html skills to fix it, however, it keeps coming back. Sorry for your pain and suffering if it’s jacked up yet again.