Operation: I’m pregnant

In my day I’ve done and said some things I’m not exactly proud of. Some things that would disappoint my mother. Some things I wouldn’t share during a face-to-face confession with a priest. Some things… well you get the point I’m sure. With all that in mind, there are some actions that go beyond the realms of disappointing. Some things that you quite frankly have to be a pretty f*cked up person to do. I could name a few, but what is currently stabbing at my brain is how a woman can lie about pregnancy.

There’s two different flavors of lies when it comes to this. The first being a woman telling a man that she is pregnant by him, knowing damn well the only growing in her belly are insecurity and lies. The second is woman telling a man, a good man, she is pregnant by him, while she’s almost positive her baby daddy-to-be is her prison bound boyfriend who has “thug life” tattooed to his face. The latter is worse, at least in my professional opinion. Yes professional, I’ve been appointed the board of directors. You’re welcome.

3am phone call to say you’re pregnant when you’re not. Really, is the best method to keep a man from leaving? What is the thought process behind this? My man is about to leave me, what do I do? Hmm.. I know! I’ll tell him I’m prego! And then what? You can only pretend to be pregnant for so long. Eventually you will have to fake getting an abortion to keep up with the lie. Otherwise, unless he hasn’t been traumatized by this experience like I was, then I’m pretty sure he will figure it out. Either way, eventually it’s game over. I can think of plenty of other ways to accomplish keeping a man. Some aren’t exactly G-rated and others are pretty simple. Bottom line, if you tried your hardest to make it work and he still doesn’t want you, then life goes on. Sh*t, put out an ad for love on Facebook and call it a day.

As for the other flavor, no one told you to sleep with the spawn of O-Dog. Why must the good guy suffer? I imagine that dealing with an unexpected pregnancy is more than stressful, for both parties of course. Then the blame is put on the good guy, and he does as expected. He steps up, perhaps he even welcomes it. Only to find out that he isn’t really the father. That’s unrecoverable damage right there. If there wasn’t a child at stake, doing something like that should be punishable by stoning. Again, that’s if you ask for my professional opinion.

We’ve all seen it on tv. More specifically on talk shows like Maury. We laugh or briefly exchange sentiments of how messed up that is. The thing is, if we take away the cameras, producers, budgets, and audience  – we have real life. This stuff actually happens right next door.  If there’s some logical explanation as to why a woman would do this with good intentions, I’d love to hear it.

Oh yea…. fear is not an acceptable answer, it will bounce like a bad check.

– Vic Louis
12:12am?  Way past my bedtime.

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2 Comments

Filed under What I'm thinking

2 responses to “Operation: I’m pregnant

  1. Dimples

    Oh man girls can be so crazy…Wowwww

  2. Haitian_Dessilines

    That is real talk

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